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    Category: Engaged

    Engagement can be a bit like romantic purgatory for some, but at least you get to test drive a ring.

    Quantify Quantum Love

    | Washington, D.C., USA | Engaged

    Fiancée: “I love you.”

    Me: “I love you more.”

    Fiancée: “That’s not possible because you don’t know exactly how much I love you, therefore you cannot tell me you love me more.”

    Me: “Aaaand you don’t know how much I love you, so it’s entirely possible that even though I do not know how much you actually love me, I could still love you more.”

    Fiancée: “That’s not how it works because you can’t say more if you don’t have a baseline.”

    Me: “It’s like Schrödinger’s Cat.”

    Fiancée: “It’s NOTHING like Schrödinger’s Cat.”

    Wish You Had Amnesia To Forget That Joke

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | Engaged

    Fiancée: “Wow, my knee is really hurting all of a sudden.”

    Me: *playfully* “What did you do to your knee?”

    Fiancée: “I don’t remember doing anything to it.”

    Me: “So you have am-knee-sia?”

    Belly Flop

    | Salem, OR, USA | Engaged

    (My fiancée are having a lazy day at home. I’m starting to feel kinda hungry, and it’s about dinner time.)

    Me: “Whenever you’re ready for dinner, say something.”

    Fiancée: “I was actually just about to ask about dinner”

    Me: *overly dramatic, growl-y voice* “We are one! OUR BELLIES ARE LINKED!”

    (He looks at me like I just grew another head.)

    Fiancée: “…That was terrifying, lover.”

    Fifty Shades Of Doctor Who

    | Melbourne, VIC, Australia | Engaged

    (My fiancé and I are watching one of the season finales of Doctor Who. In this episode, the Doctor’s love interest has finally been reunited with him after having been stuck in a parallel world for two seasons. The last time they spoke, he tried to tell her he loved her but they were separated before he could. Now she has returned and is torn between the Doctor and a newly made ‘clone’ of the Doctor, who is equivalent in every way except that he’s human rather than a nearly immortal alien, so he can spend the rest of his human life with her if she chooses. To help her decide, she decides to ask both the ‘original’ doctor and the ‘clone’ doctor a question:)

    Female Love Interest: “All right, both of you, answer me this. When I last stood on this beach — on the worst day of my life — what was the last thing you said to me? Go on, say it.”

    The Original Doctor: “I said, ‘[Female Love Interest]…'”

    Female Love Interest: “Yeah, and? How was that sentence gonna end?”

    The Original Doctor: “Does it need saying?”

    Female Love Interest: *turns to the clone* “And you, Doctor? What was the end of that sentence?”

    (The clone Doctor whispers in her ear.)

    My fiancé: *imitating the Doctor as he’s whispering* “Why, yes, my sonic screwdriver DOES have a vibrator setting.”

    (Female Love Interest proceeded to fling her arms around the clone Doctor and kiss him passionately while I doubled over laughing.)

    A Flash Of Inspiration

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Engaged

    (I’m on the other side of the country from my fiancé, while he’s packing up our apartment to move to the city I’m currently in. He has help, but it’s a hot July day and he’s boiling and frazzled and hungry and tired. At this point, we’re Skyping as he’s going through the last minutiae in the apartment to see what I want and what can be thrown away or left behind. The help he has is both sets of parents (his and mine). My parents are taking some of our boxes to their house for temporary safekeeping because we unfortunately reserved too small of a truck.)

    Fiancé: “What about this? Do you want this?” *points the camera at a very warm blanket*

    Me: “Well, yeah, but not right away.”

    Fiancé: “Okay, that’s going with your mom.”

    (This goes on for a few minutes, with him getting more and more frazzled as my mom and his dad ask him more questions.)

    Me: “Honey? Honey? Honey?” *repeating myself until he hears me*

    Fiancé: “Huh?”

    Me: “Can you go into the bedroom?”

    Fiancé: *confused* “What for?”

    Me: “Just do it. And shut the door.”

    Fiancé: *still confused, but goes into the bedroom and shuts the door*

    Me: *lifts my shirt and flashes him*

    Fiancé: *gets a big goofy grin on his face*

    Me: “Feel better?”

    Fiancé: *grinning* “A bit.”

    Me: *fixes shirt* “Good.”

    (We finished up sorting through what was left and then we got off Skype so they could clean the apartment and leave.)


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