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    Category: Engaged

    Engagement can be a bit like romantic purgatory for some, but at least you get to test drive a ring.

    Earn Your Strip(e)s

    | NY, USA | Engaged, Themed Giveaway

    (My fiancé is making dinner when I wander through the kitchen. We both have fairly deadpan senses of humor and enjoy saying outlandish things.)

    Me: “Oh, hey. I found these in your pants sorting the laundry.”

    (I toss a few folded single dollar bills to him.)

    Me: “You got those stripping, didn’t you?”

    Fiancé: “Yes, I got those stripping. I got all the money through stripping. I did all of the stripping.”

    Me: “I dunno. There’s not a lot there. You must not be a very good stripper.”

    Fiancé: *with great dignity* “I. Am an EXCELLENT. Stripper.”

    A Pet Hate

    | MO, USA | Engaged, Themed Giveaway

    (My fiancé and I are talking about different kinds of pets. I have just mentioned that I do not want to have a bird.)

    Fiancé: “But I would love to have a trained falcon!”

    Me: “Yeah, okay.”

    Fiancé: “A falcon would be the best pet. Because then it could eat other people’s pets.”

    Me: “…”

    Not A Sound Reason

    | Seattle, WA, USA | Engaged, Themed Giveaway

    (I’m lying in bed with my fiancée early in the morning. We’re both super groggy when we wake up so we tend to have weird conversations before we’re fully awake.)

    Fiancée: *smacks my butt loudly* “Hmm…”

    Me: “What?”

    Fiancée: “It’s just- I keep trying to recreate the sound your butt makes, but I just can’t find it. Your butt’s just too perfect.”

    Me: “Aww, that’s sw— Wait. How do you make a butt-smack sound, anyway?”

    Fiancée: “You know. I hit a bunch of stuff like beanbags, hams, pillows, but nothing has that satisfying smack your butt makes!”

    Me: “You smack hams to make a butt sound?”

    Fiancée: “Yeah. Well, the closest I’ve come is the turkey you made at Thanksgiving. It kinda sounded like your butt when I smacked it.”

    Me: “…”

    (Needless to say, I’m keeping an eye on any meats I bring home from the supermarket from now on.)

    As Seen On All The TVs

    | Tampa, FL, USA | Engaged

    (My fiancé and I are registering for wedding gifts when the registering gun goes dead. My fiancé takes it back up to the front counter, gets a new one, and then literally RUNS away from me. I find him in the electronics section registering TVs.)

    Me: “Uh, how many TVs did you just register us for?”

    Fiancé: *startled that I found him* “I’ll never tell you!” *runs away*

    (He’s a keeper, but now I have to log in to the registry to delete a bunch of TVs.)

    Overflowing Sentiment, Part 2

    | Salt Lake City, UT, USA | Engaged, Themed Giveaway

    (I’m texting my fiancé while we are both at work, letting him know what a good mood I am in.)

    Me: “I feel like if I were any happier, happiness would explode out my ears.”

    Fiancé: “That’s great, babe.”

    Me: “Can I ooze happiness on you later?”

    Fiancé: “Sure.”

    Me: “Yay!”

    Related:
    Overflowing Sentiment


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