(My Dad is telling me a joke.)

Dad: “Did you hear that a woman gets run over every 15 minutes?”

Me: “Really?”

Dad: “Yeah, she’s starting to get cheesed off.”

(I laugh. My mum enters the room, so my Dad tries his joke on her.)

Dad: “Hey, have you heard that a woman gets run over every 15 minutes?”

Mum: “She should get out of the bleeding road then!”

(I have a couple of rare medical conditions, including acute muscle atrophy and a connective tissue disorder. They are not life-threatening, but can be frustrating at best.)

Boyfriend: “I love you.”

Me: “You just made my heart stop for a second. I love you, too.”

Boyfriend: “Wait, with your medical issues, do you only mean that figuratively?”

Me: “Figuratively. ‘Skip a beat’ would probably have been more appropriate.”

(It’s Christmas morning, and my boyfriend and I are exchanging gifts. We’ve been together for over 4 years at this point.)

Him: “Wait, there’s one more for you.”

Me: “Okay…”

(He reaches behind his back and gets down on a knee. I start tearing up.)

Him: “Here you go, a gift certificate for a mani/pedi. You deserve it!”

(A few years later and we’re still together…and I have excellent nails!)

(I’m at a mall an I am watching the kids with Santa. A girl of about 5 comes up.)

Girl: “I want a boyfriend for Christmas.”

Santa: “Oh, really? Well, all the boys that asked for a girlfriend are all much older than you.”

Girl: “That’s exactly what I want.” *jumps up and down* “I want someone as old as my grandpa!”

(I already know I am getting a ring for Christmas, but decided to tease my boyfriend when we went to see Santa at Santa’s Grotto.)

Santa: “And what do you want for Christmas?”

Me: “A ring! But, I’ll settle for coffee.”

Santa: “Um…” *to my boyfriend* “Did I get you in trouble?”

Boyfriend: “It’s okay, the ring’s in my pocket. I just haven’t given it to her yet.”

Santa: “Merry Christmas, then!”

(We proposed to each other later that day.)