(My boyfriend and I have a running joke about how our entire relationship is built on hypocrisy and double standards, in a good way. I am tickling him.)

Boyfriend: “Do you really want to start this? You know I always beat you?”

Me: “I know.”

(I stop for about ten seconds and then start again. He starts tickling me.)

Me: “No, no, stop! That’s not fair.”

Boyfriend: “Yet more double standards.”

Me: “If we get engaged, we should have that engraved on the inside of our rings. I want to be double standards.”

Boyfriend: *affectionately* “Then I’ll be your hypocrite.”