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  • Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 19
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  • Till Undeath Do Us Part, Part 36

    | NS, Canada | Dating

    Me: “What would you do if I became a zombie?”

    Boyfriend: “I would freeze you while I worked on a cure.”

    Me: “So you’d kill me, and just delay your grief by pretending that I could have actually survived the freezing process?”

    Boyfriend: “Zombies can totally survive freezing.”

    Me: “So the evil cryogenic scientists would have you believe. It’s just a scam to make money off of rich dead people.”

    Boyfriend: “That’s the difference between you and me. You believe in science.”

    Me: “What do you believe in?”

    Boyfriend: “Max Brooks.”

    Related:
    Till Undeath Do Us Part, Part 35
    Till Undeath Do Us Part, Part 34
    Till Undeath Do Us Part, Part 33

    Can’t Get Over The Breastplate

    | UK | Dating, Theme Of The Month

    (My boyfriend is playing an RPG with dragons and magic.)

    Boyfriend: “Look. When I give a woman armour that came from a man, it puts boobs in. That’s so farfetched.”

    Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 19

    | Canada | Flirting/How We Met, Theme Of The Month

    (I work at a video game store. There’s a female customer who comes in often, but rarely buys anything. One day, when she comes in, I decide to help her.)

    Me: “Can I help you?”

    Customer: “Oh, yes, please. I’m looking for a new game.”

    Me: “Okay, what systems do you have?”

    (I listen in shock as the customer rattles off almost every platform.)

    Me: “What games do you like?”

    Customer: “Almost anything. I’m not choosy.”

    Me: “Well, how about Fire Emblem Awakening?”

    Customer: “Already have it. It’s a pretty good game.”

    Me:Pokémon?”

    Customer: “Have it. Almost caught them all… Except for the event Pokémon.”

    (This goes on for a good 10 minutes. Every time I suggest a game she already has it, and most of the time, has beaten it. Finally, I can’t find any others.)

    Me: “So you have all these games, and caught almost every Pokémon?”

    Customer: “Yep.”

    Me: “Marry me!”

    (The customer, sadly, said no. But she still comes in and looks for more games. Now, every time she comes in my coworkers joke about her being the one that got away…)

    Related:
    Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 17
    Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 16
    Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 15

    Beard Bad Wolf

    | Winnipeg, MB, Canada | Engaged

    (My fiancé and I are in a parking lot and he is in the process of unlocking his car. I am tugging the handle and saying ‘let me in! let me in!’)

    Fiancé: “Not by the hair on my chinny chin chin!” *he has a beard*

    Me: “Then I’ll cut them off!”

    Fiancé: “That’s not how it goes!”

    Me: “Well, I can’t huff and puff my way into your car!”

    Fiancé: “That’s because I’m the third pig and you can’t knock my s*** over!”

    Our Whole Relationship Was In A Hot, Dense, State…

    | Denmark | Marriage & Partners, Theme Of The Month

    (My husband and I are both huge fans of ‘The Big Bang Theory,’ but due to lack of new episodes it’s been a while since we saw it last. One night as I’m heading off to bed…)

    Me: *replying to something he said* “True that.”

    Husband: “True dat?”

    Me: “…yeah, I’ve gotten a lot more street since we dated.”

    Husband: “I love you so much! That was exactly what I had in mind. This is why we fit so perfectly together.”

    (Slight pause.)

    Husband: “One thing worries me though… Apparently you’re Leonard and I’m Penny!”


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