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  • Love Cures All
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  • Weird Levels Have Hit Tea Total

    | Australia | Dating

    Boyfriend: “So, today I made the mistake of dissolving aspirin in my tea…”

    Me: “Oh, god.”

    Boyfriend: “It TASTED fine, but the aspirin turned into a brown goo, and it floated to the top. And I ended up having to eat it with a spoon.”

    Me: “Eww. Why didn’t you just throw it out?”

    Boyfriend: *faking exasperated condescension* “But, [My Name], that would have been a waste of tea!”

    Me: “Interesting how I’M the weird one by the end of this conversation…”

    It’s Not That Easy Being Not That Green

    | Rolla, MO, USA | Dating

    (My boyfriend of nearly two years is not afraid of speaking his mind to me. This exchange happened right before going out for an afternoon.)

    Me: “What do you think of my outfit?”

    (I am wearing an aqua shirt and pale aqua shorts with dark blue accessories.)

    Boyfriend: “You look like a cucumber!”

    Me: “What?! A cucumber? That isn’t very correct, let alone flattering.”

    Boyfriend: “I’m just teasing; you look like a very pretty lady cucumber.”

    Me: “Why a cucumber? I’m not even wearing green!”

    Boyfriend: “Sure you are! Green shirt, green shorts, cucumber!”

    Me: “This is aqua, possibly turquoise. NOT green. Maybe you need your eyes checked.”

    Boyfriend: “Nah, my eyes are fine, I know you are the most beautiful lady cucumber around and I am a really lucky man to have you!”

    Me: “You are lucky I’m a tolerant lady cucumber, you goof.”

    Love Cures All

    | IA, USA | Golden Years, Marriage & Partners

    (My mother is the in-house lawyer for one of the hospitals in our city and always makes sure to say hi to people in the hallways. This occurs with a woman that she has seen several times pushing another woman in a reclining wheel chair who is clearly completely disabled to the point that she is unaware of her surroundings.)

    Mom: “Hi, there!”

    Woman #1: “Hi, didn’t I see you at the Bar Association outing this summer?”

    Mom: “Yes, I bet you did.”

    Woman #1: “Yeah, I thought so. I haven’t kept up my license but I always like to go and see everyone.”

    (They talk for a few minutes about the types of law they’ve practiced and where.)

    Mom: “I see you here frequently. Do you volunteer with hospice?”

    Woman #1: “No, this is my wife.”

    (It turned out that Woman #2 had advanced stage Alzheimer’s and her wife, Woman #1, took her for a walk everyday even though Woman #2 didn’t have any clue who she was. Love isn’t always romantic but it is always beautiful.)

    A Naked Pause

    | Henrietta, NY, USA | Dating

    (My boyfriend and I are walking around the mall. We stop at a necklace kiosk. He has never had any intimate experience and has never seen a woman naked in person before.)

    Me: *pointing to a gaudy chain necklace with a giant leopard pendant* “I kind of like that. I could see myself wearing it.”

    Boyfriend: *laughs* “Me too.”

    Me: *as we are walking away* “…wearing only that.”

    Boyfriend: *stops dead in the middle of the hallway and stares forward*

    Me: “Honey?” *waves hand in front of face*

    Boyfriend: *grinning hugely at me* “Sorry. That was the first time I ever imagined you naked.”

    Me: *laughs* “So you had to stop walking?”

    Boyfriend: “Did I stop? My brain just kind of fizzled out… I couldn’t think of anything else.”

    (We are now married and he still gets the same look of awe every time we do anything that involves less clothing!)

    Don’t Have Dessert Too URL-y

    | Davie, FL, USA | Engaged

    (I am chatting online with my fiancé about buying stairs or a ramp for our elderly dog so he can get onto our bed. I send him a couple of URLs which include the word “chocolate” as a color descriptor and the weight that they support.)

    Fiancé: “Those URLs sound a lot more tasty than their actual contents. I wanted hundreds of pounds of chocolate.”

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