Me: “You’re so cute when you’re not being annoying.”

Boyfriend: “You’re so annoying when you’re not being cute.”

(My boyfriend has left his computer unattended. I am about to post rude remarks on his social networking account, when I notice he has two music videos open. One is ‘Point Your Finger’, by popular Australian children’s band ‘The Wiggles’. The other has an obscenity laden band name and title, and a quick listen reveals it consists mainly of distorted samples and screaming. When he comes back in, he sees me listening to it with an expression of bewilderment on my face.)

Boyfriend: “I can explain!”

Me: “I’m not sure I want to know. But sure, go ahead…”

Boyfriend: “Well, you know how I like my art Dadaist, and true art is meant to be incomprehensible? It’s basically the musical equivalent of that; mocking various other electronic music styles, and being as strange and disturbing as possible!”

Me: “That’s… not really a great explanation. But I guess it makes sense for you. But why ‘The Wiggles’ as well?”

Boyfriend: “Have you looked at that? It’s the only music I’ve found that comes close to [other band] in complete insanity!”

(My boyfriend and I are both nerds. After reading through the Chemically Imbalanced series, I decide to try it.)

Me: “Sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium!”

Boyfriend: “Hey Jude!”

Me: “Close enough.”

Related:
Chemically Imbalanced, Part 9
Chemically Imbalanced, Part 8
Chemically Imbalanced, Part 7
Chemically Imbalanced, Part 6
Chemically Imbalanced, Part 5
Chemically Imbalanced, Part 4
Chemically Imbalanced, Part 3
Chemically Imbalanced, Part 2
Chemically Imbalanced

(My boyfriend sneezes repeatedly.)

Me: “Bless you.”

Boyfriend: *sneezes*

Me: “Bless you.”

Boyfriend: *sneezes*

Me: “Bless—you know what? F*** it.”

(My husband and I met when I was working at a travel store. He had stopped in to look at satellite radios, and I was the one who ended up helping him. We’re talking about how we met a few years later.)

Husband: “Yeah, I just came in to buy a radio, and there you were.”

Me: “Well, it’s not like I was nice to you. I was mean to almost everybody so they’d leave me alone.”

Husband: “I know! But when you went and got the radio out of the case, you stayed kneeling on the ground and your pants slid down a little on the back and I could see your butt a little.”

Me: “Seriously?!”

Husband: “Well, yeah! You didn’t think I was looking at a radio for twenty minutes, did you?”