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  • Facing The Romance
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  • Keeping Four Score

    | IL, USA | Marriage & Partners

    (My husband and I are driving home from work when he reaches over and pokes me with one finger in the leg.)

    Me: “What was that, foreplay?”

    Husband: “Nope, this is!” *he then proceeded to poke me with FOUR fingers!*

    Focus On The Road A-Head

    | USA | Dating

    (My boyfriend and I are sitting at a red light.)

    Boyfriend: “I need to speak rather frankly with you… What’s your opinion on road head?”

    Me: “No.”

    Boyfriend: “All right, that’ll just be tucked away as a fantasy, then.”

    Me: “I’d be afraid of an accident. I mean as long as the car is stationary…”

    (Boyfriend looks me dead in the eyes and without skipping a beat shifts the gear to park)

    Dying For A Romantic Gesture

    | Brisbane, QLD, Australia | Dating

    (I am in the car with my boyfriend when a song comes on the radio…)

    Me: “Would you catch a grenade for me?”

    Boyfriend: “I would if the pin hadn’t been pulled.”

    Me: “Well, would you stand in front of a train for me?”

    Boyfriend: “If it were stationary.”

    (And he’s normally the romantic one!)

    He’s Taken With You

    | Henrietta, NY, USA | Marriage & Partners

    (My husband likes to go into grand speeches about how much he loves me and how beautiful I am. Usually this is great, but not always.)

    Husband: “You’re so beautiful.”

    Me: “Aww, thanks honey.”

    Husband: “You’re the kind of beautiful where I’d be worried to take you to Europe or something because I’d be concerned you’d be kidnapped and sold into sex trade.”

    Me: *burst out laughing* “That’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever said!”

    Husband: “Well…”

    Me: “This is so going on Not Always Romantic.”

    Husband: *sighs* “As soon as I said it, I knew…”

    Showing Off Their Nimbus 2000

    | Birmingham, AL, USA | Marriage & Partners

    (Despite having been the target reading audience for the Harry Potter books when they first came out, my husband and I have only just read them for the first time. After we finish, we both join the Harry Potter online community, Pottermore, and find out we are in different houses; I’m a Ravenclaw, he’s a Slytherin. I’ve been teasing him about this for a while. We are on our way home from a friend’s house when my husband, who is driving, guns the engine.)

    Me: “Whoa! Why are you revving the car out like that?”

    Husband: “Hey, if you have a lot of power, you might as well use it.”

    Me: “Wow. I guess we know who the potential dictator in the family is now.”

    Husband: “Well, I AM a Slytherin.”

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