Category: Boyfriend/Girlfriend

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The Low Point Of Their Relationship

| NY, USA | Boyfriend/Girlfriend

(A week before this story, I had to take my boyfriend to the ER for a bad head wound that ended up needing staples. I take him back to the ER to get them removed a week later and chat with one of the doctors while another doctor removes the staples behind a curtain.)

Me: “Yeah, I already heard the joke of ‘What did you do to him?’ when we came here last week.”

Doctor: *laughing* “Well, what DID you do to him?”

Me: “Look, I’m 5’4”, and he’s really tall. If I was going to do damage to him, I wouldn’t be able to do anything to his head. It would be—“

Doctor: “His knees?”

Me: “Or, you know, other areas that would hurt.”

(My boyfriend and the other doctor come out from behind the curtain, and the doctor I’m talking with sees that my boyfriend is 6’5″ tall.)

Doctor: “Oh, man, you weren’t kidding.”

Me: “See? I told you! Below the belt!”

Boyfriend: “I don’t even want to know… do I?”

(I promise I love him!)

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Can’t Take That Bach

| ON, Canada | Boyfriend/Girlfriend, Punny

(My boyfriend and I are at school and he is packing up his locker, looking for a specific music book.)

Me: “Ready to go?”

Boyfriend: “Just a minute… Found it!” *pulls out Bach music book*

Me: *giant grin* “Soooo… you couldn’t find that book at first, right?”

Boyfriend: “Yeah?”

Me: “So it was lost… And now it’s Bach?”

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Would Hate To See Dressed Down

| AB, Canada | Boyfriend/Girlfriend

(I’ve just gotten home from work and see my boyfriend standing in the kitchen. He’s wearing khakis and a t-shirt.)

Me: “What are you all dressed up for?”

Boyfriend: “This is dressed up?”

Me: “Well… you’re wearing pants.”

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Have Reached Critical Flirting

| USA | Boyfriend/Girlfriend

(My boyfriend and I play Dungeons and Dragons, a game that involves rolling a 20 sided die. Rolling a 20 is a “critical hit” so you do double damage, but rolling a 1 means you fail automatically.)

Me: “I roll to kiss you!” *rolls imaginary dice* “Nat 20!”

Boyfriend: “I roll to resist!” *rolls imaginary dice* “Oh, no, a natural one!”

Me: *kisses him once* “Oh, wait, I do double damage!” *kisses him again*

Boyfriend: “That was the nerdiest flirting ever.”

Me: “Yeah, but it worked!”

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Wishing For Cheese

| Cambridge, ON, Canada | Boyfriend/Girlfriend

(I am at my boyfriend’s 23rd birthday party with him and his family. I have made him a very special birthday cake and he has just blown out the candles.)

Boyfriend’s Mom: “What did you wish for?”

Boyfriend: *puts his arm around me* “I don’t need a wish. I already have everything I want and need right here.”

Me: *blushing madly* “Aww, babe…”

Boyfriend’s Mom: “That was cheesy.”

Me: “That’s okay! I love cheese!”

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