My boyfriend and I are on a very long road trip, as I am moving from my hometown in Connecticut to live with him in Oklahoma. One night we stop at a gas station to refuel and use the restroom.
There’s a very disheveled man in the little (closed) restaurant area of the station. When we come through the doors he gets up and starts talking to us, and being a very anxious person it makes me a little uncomfortable. My boyfriend just tells me to go to the bathroom, so I do.
When I come out, my boyfriend is sitting in a booth with the man, who is happily talking to him about nothing in particular. He is clearly not all there mentally, but harmless; he just doesn’t have anywhere to go. When I come to the booth he is very excitedly talking to my boyfriend about his boots.
My boyfriend chats with him for a while, but tells him we have to get going. He looks sad — my boyfriend was probably the first person to actually engage him in conversation for a while — until my boyfriend hands him a fifty and tells him to get something to eat and maybe a place to stay for the night. The man looks about to cry, he is so happy.
If I had any doubts about moving halfway across the country for that man, that pretty much banished them all.
He’s since started working in juvenile mental health, and is the favorite staff of a lot of troubled kids.
Me: “What would you do if I died?”
Boyfriend: “I would build a school in your name and everybody would learn, create, and build, and your name would never be forgotten.”
Me: “So, you’d never remarry?”
Me: “You’d never find a new girlfriend?”
Me: “And what would you do for sex?”
Boyfriend: “Well, I’d have a whole school…”
(My boyfriend and I are sitting at home, trying to find something to watch. He opens up our HBO app on the television and scrolls down to the Late Night section.)
Boyfriend: “What’s this?”
Me: “It’s soft porn.”
Boyfriend: “Oh…. Oh, my god, I didn’t know they had this on here!”
Me: “Soft porn is so boring, though.”
Boyfriend: “I know. I’m just looking. Hey, it’s [Random Actress I’ve never heard of]!”
Me: *looks slowly over at him* “How do you know that?”
Boyfriend: “Oh… uh… she’s just an actress I like.”
Boyfriend: *guilty grin* “Porn.”
(To be honest, I don’t have a problem with porn and my boyfriend knows it. But while he knows a LOT more names of actresses and actors than I do, I just wasn’t aware his knowledge stretched that far.)
(I have had sore back muscles for several days, and today woke up with a headache that steadily worsens into a migraine. After driving me home from work, my boyfriend grabs a roll-on bottle of menthol muscle rub and proceeds to rub it on my forehead and neck. My migraine is completely gone in less than five minutes. A bit later I have the idea to rub some on my back as well, to ease the muscle pain.)
Me: “Babe, can you please rub some of that on my back as well?”
Boyfriend: “I suppose. Stand up.”
(I stand up and he rubs it over the problem areas of my back. When he’s done, he does a little cackle/chuckle, and then turns back to what he was previously doing.)
Me: *sighs a little* “You just drew a penis on my back, didn’t you?”
Boyfriend: *grins really big* “Yiss.” *pickers up for a kiss*
Me: “Dork.” *kisses him*
(My boyfriend is fantastic: gorgeous, funny, sweet, thoughtful.. But definitely suffers from ‘man colds’; he whines so much you’d think he was dying every time he gets a little bit sick. We’ve reached the point where we can at least joke about it, which helps me cope with how annoying he can be. He has caught a cold and left work early; I pick up soups for him and come home after I’m off. I find him in our room buried in a giant nest of blankets. He lifts his head weakly.)
Boyfriend: “The world is ending.”
Me: “Because you have the sniffles?”
Boyfriend: “Yes. It’s like CHILDBIRTH.”