Category: Boyfriend/Girlfriend

Standing Gayly

| Bethesda, MD, USA | Boyfriend/Girlfriend, LGBTQ, Popular

(I have two female friends who are dating. They are both fairly short, but one is much taller than the other. As a result, hugging while standing up can sometimes be painful. When the shorter makes a mistake with her wording, hilarity ensues.)

Both: *hugging*

Taller Girlfriend: “Ugh, this is hurting my back.”

Smaller Girlfriend: “Then why don’t you stand up like a straight person?”

Taller Girlfriend: “…”

Smaller Girlfriend: “No, wait!”

Me: *sinks to the floor laughing hysterically*

Motherly Love(y Dovey)

| Kitchener, ON, Canada | Boyfriend/Girlfriend, Family/Kids, Popular

(My mom and I are teaching my boyfriend how to play a card game. My boyfriend and I have cute, playful insults for each other. For example, if I call him a doofus, he’ll call me dorkface, and if he calls me pumpkin, I’ll call him cupcake. We’ve been using these insults the entire game.)

Me: *counting up points after losing* “You just HAD to go out, didn’t you?”

Boyfriend: “I looooove you!”

Me: *play pouting* “I love you, too… cupcake.”

Boyfriend: “Dork face.”

Me: “Doofus!”

Boyfriend: “Pumpkin!”

Mom: “Jerk!”

(My boyfriend and I both get fake offended.)

Me: “Mom!”

Mom: “What? It was too lovey-dovey in here. Someone had to do it!”

(Boyfriend and I both broke down laughing as we got back to the game!)

Strawberry Hairs Forever

| WA, USA | Boyfriend/Girlfriend, Popular

(My girlfriend, who is a foot taller than me, left something at my house. I took several days to return it. Since we last saw each other, I switched to a coconut scented shampoo.)

Me: “[Girlfriend], here is your item back.”

Girlfriend: *bends over to hug me and puts her face in my hair* “Thank you so much. Oh, your hair smells like strawberries, I love it.”

Me: “I am confused about how you smell strawberries, but I’m glad you like it.”

Her Birthday Suit Is For You

| HI, USA | Boyfriend/Girlfriend, Popular

(I work in a well-known department store, and am stationed in the young women’s clothing section today. A 20-something man approaches me.)

Customer: “Hi, I’m looking to get an outfit for my girlfriend? It’s for her birthday.”

Me: “Sounds great! Do you have an idea of her personal style, or what she usually likes to wear?”

Customer: “Well, this is mostly about what I like her to wear.”

Me: “…”

(At least he was honest about his priorities.)

Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 25

| Kitchener, ON, Canada | Boyfriend/Girlfriend, Family/Kids, Popular

(I have just come home from an annual anime convention that I’ve been attending for eight years, and my boyfriend has come over to see me and join my family for dinner. I’ve always been an avid Pokémon fan, while he’s not. We have a running joke where I tell him I’m going to convert him, and he tells me that he still has his soul.)

Me: *showing him everything I bought at the convention* “Look! I got a shiny Ditto plushie!”

Boyfriend: “Ditto?”

Me: “SHINY Ditto! You know how rare that is?”

Boyfriend: *takes plushie* “THIS is a Pokémon?”

Me: “Yes! That’s Ditto! It’s usually pink, but the shiny version is blue. You know your chance of encountering a shiny is 1 in 8192! So it’s super rare!”

Boyfriend: “Babe…. You’re geeking out over a shiny dildo?”

Me: *laughing* “Woah, woah, woah! [Boyfriend]!”

Boyfriend: *sputtering* “Ditto! I meant Ditto!”

Dad: *off to the side, cracking up, laughing to himself*

Me: *teasing* “I know you don’t like Pokémon, but really?!”

Boyfriend: “I- I don’t know why I just said that…”

Dad: “I bet Freud could tell you!”

Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 24
Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 23
Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 22