Category: Engaged

Engagement can be a bit like romantic purgatory for some, but at least you get to test drive a ring.


It’s Not A Party Until It’s A Party

| Tacoma, WA, USA | Engaged

(My partner and I have just gotten officially engaged though we have discussed our wedding prior to this. For context when I mentioned weddings having themes his mind immediately went to party themes and he suggested ‘Doctor Who.’)

Me: “So, are you cool with having [Four Friends] as our wedding party?”

Partner: “Yeah, it can be at the laser tag place!”

Me: “You do know that the wedding party just means the groomsmen and bridesmaids, right?”

Partner: “Ohhhh…”


Pan’s Potato

| Adelaide, SA, Australia | Engaged

(I am talking with my fiancé about weird films (eg. Pan’s Labyrinth, etc.) and Doug Jones (Pale Man, with the eyes in his hands).)

Me: “He has a very distinct body type. Once you apply prosthetics, like elongated fingers, he takes on a creepy factor.”

Fiancé: “Like me; I have long arms and hands.”

Me: “No, you’re pretty proportionate.” *stares* “Maybe your arms are a little longer, but you’ve got a rectangle torso… and an oval head.”

Fiancé: “I love you, too?”

Me: “No, I mean artistically, you’ve got a rectangle torso, and oval head, and proportional arms and legs.” *thinks for a moment* “Unlike me. My body type is ‘fat.’ Fat torso, fat legs, fat head… fat mouth that won’t shut up.

Fiancé: “You’re like a potato in a potato field… that just ate all the other potatoes.”


Floored With That Proposal

| Dorset, England, UK | Engaged, Proposals

(I am working up the courage to ask my girlfriend to marry me. Being a little old fashioned a about this, I ask her father for permission first, one weekend we are visiting. He’s delighted, and tells me to do it ASAP. Shortly after, my girlfriend and her mother walk into the room. I get down on one knee and propose.)

Girlfriend: “Get up off the floor; you’ll get your trousers dirty!”

Girlfriend’s Father: “The man asked you a question. Answer him!”

Girlfriend’s Mother: “What are you insinuating about the state of my floors?”

(Still happily married, now five years later!)


Overly Onerous Operation

| MA, USA | Engaged, Popular

(My name begins with an ‘O.’ I’m with my fiancé, who tells me that he’s thinking of something very nice that begins with an ‘O.’ I decide to have some fun with him.)

Me: “Are you thinking about orchids?”

Fiancé: “No.”

Me: “How about otters?”

Fiancé: “They are nice, but no.”

Me: “The ocean?”

Fiancé: “No.”

Me: “Ocarinas?”

Fiancé: “No.”

Me: “I know! You’re thinking about October!”

Fiancé: “No.”

(This continues for a while, with my suggestions getting progressively more strange. Finally, I’m a little bored with the game.)

Me: “Are you thinking about me?”

Fiancé: “No.”

Me: “What are you thinking about, then?”

Fiancé: “Orgasms!”

(He said it so happily and with such a big smile that I cracked up for about ten minutes straight.)


Sweet And Salty Love

| Syracuse, NY, USA | Engaged, Popular

(I’m just getting home and my fiancé comes to give me a hug. I smile when I see him.)

Fiancé: “I love your smile.”

Me: “I love all of you.” *kisses*

Fiancé: “You light up the room.”

Me: “You taste like pretzels.”

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