Category: Family/Kids

Family and/or kids always adds spice to any relationship. Specifically, the kind of spice that gets in your eyes and makes you cry.

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Mother Is Trying To Rent Them Apart

| USA | Dating, Family/Kids, Popular

(I’ve been with my boyfriend for ten months. Due to issues with his prior roommate he moved back to his mom’s house with his sister, cousin, stepdad, stepsister, and her boyfriend,. Around two months ago I pretty much moved in. Although none of us ever really discussed it, it just became accepted that I was sleeping over every night. Knowing that she’s having a tough month financially we approach her and I offer to start paying rent. She decides to up HIS rent and then demand that I match it, essentially tripling her income. The following argument ensued with me still in the room. It should be noted his ex used to live there with him while she was carless, jobless, and “pregnant.”)

Boyfriend: “Don’t you think that’s a bit much? She drives me to work every day and she really doesn’t use that much extra.”

His Mom: “It sounds pretty fair to me. Besides we agreed no one else was moving in.”

Boyfriend: “What are you talking about?”

His Mom: “Well, after all the issues with the LAST one I thought we made an agreement.”

Boyfriend: “You can’t be serious! Everyone here likes her, she works full time plus has a side job, she owns her car, she’s been getting me to work every day. AND she’s not a stray like the last one was!”

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I Love You From Your Head To Your Toes

| New Zealand | Advice, Family/Kids, Popular

(I have hurt my back and cannot do many things for myself, as bending or moving hurts. I am telling my mother about how sweet my boyfriend has been, including helping me shower. It should also be noted that I have been a dancer most of my life, and have the resulting messed up toes.)

Me: “[Boyfriend] was lovely, helping me shower. He washed my hair and even scrubbed between my toes!”

Mum: “He went near YOUR toes? That’s true commitment right there! Marry him already!”

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He Knows The “Rest”

| AB, Canada | Family/Kids, Marriage & Partners, Popular

(One Sunday afternoon, my husband and I sneak upstairs for some “alone time” while our nine-year-old son is blissfully plugged into Minecraft. As we are “finishing,” we hear him come thumping up the stairs and banging on our bedroom door; the door’s locked.)

Son: “Mom? Dad?”

Me: “Yes?”

Son: “I’m going outside to play.” *pauses* “Are you guys ‘resting’? *he emphasizes the word resting*

Husband: “Yes. Yes, we are.”

Son: “Just so you know, I’m doing finger quotes when I say ‘resting.’” *he emphasizes the word resting again*

(Cue much laughter from both my husband and me.)

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Motherly Love(y Dovey)

| Kitchener, ON, Canada | Boyfriend/Girlfriend, Family/Kids, Popular

(My mom and I are teaching my boyfriend how to play a card game. My boyfriend and I have cute, playful insults for each other. For example, if I call him a doofus, he’ll call me dorkface, and if he calls me pumpkin, I’ll call him cupcake. We’ve been using these insults the entire game.)

Me: *counting up points after losing* “You just HAD to go out, didn’t you?”

Boyfriend: “I looooove you!”

Me: *play pouting* “I love you, too… cupcake.”

Boyfriend: “Dork face.”

Me: “Doofus!”

Boyfriend: “Pumpkin!”

Mom: “Jerk!”

(My boyfriend and I both get fake offended.)

Me: “Mom!”

Mom: “What? It was too lovey-dovey in here. Someone had to do it!”

(Boyfriend and I both broke down laughing as we got back to the game!)

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Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 25

| Kitchener, ON, Canada | Boyfriend/Girlfriend, Family/Kids, Popular

(I have just come home from an annual anime convention that I’ve been attending for eight years, and my boyfriend has come over to see me and join my family for dinner. I’ve always been an avid Pokémon fan, while he’s not. We have a running joke where I tell him I’m going to convert him, and he tells me that he still has his soul.)

Me: *showing him everything I bought at the convention* “Look! I got a shiny Ditto plushie!”

Boyfriend: “Ditto?”

Me: “SHINY Ditto! You know how rare that is?”

Boyfriend: *takes plushie* “THIS is a Pokémon?”

Me: “Yes! That’s Ditto! It’s usually pink, but the shiny version is blue. You know your chance of encountering a shiny is 1 in 8192! So it’s super rare!”

Boyfriend: “Babe…. You’re geeking out over a shiny dildo?”

Me: *laughing* “Woah, woah, woah! [Boyfriend]!”

Boyfriend: *sputtering* “Ditto! I meant Ditto!”

Dad: *off to the side, cracking up, laughing to himself*

Me: *teasing* “I know you don’t like Pokémon, but really?!”

Boyfriend: “I- I don’t know why I just said that…”

Dad: “I bet Freud could tell you!”

Related:
Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 24
Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 23
Good Thing They Caught Each Other, Part 22

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