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Fus Roh Glittah!

| CA, USA | Boyfriend/Girlfriend, LGBTQ, Long Distance, Popular

(My girlfriend and I (I am also female) have a super big distance between us, but we make our relationship work with me flying to her every few months. We are on the phone while she’s playing Skyrim and I’m playing Undertale.)

Me: “Shush for a second! I gotta get through this part of the game and you’re screaming about dragons isn’t helping!”

Girlfriend: “I’m not screaming about the dragons! I found the cutest orphan ever and I’m going to adopt her!”

Me: “Don’t you already have four of them?”

Girlfriend: “You can’t tell me how to live my life!”

Me: “But I have access to my card and a website that sends glitter bombs.”

Girlfriend: “You wouldn’t dare!”

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Going To Let That Stew All Night

| OR, USA | Marriage & Partners, Popular

(My husband really loves the recipe my mother has for Salmon Stew. He’s had a rough day and I’ve offered to attempt to make it after getting the recipe from my mom. I’m not the best cook in the world and fail miserably. We both laugh and go on with our night. I’m also a very physically affectionate person and am constantly bugging him for touches and foot/back rubs.)

Me: “Rub my leg?”

Husband: “I’ve been rubbing your leg all night.”

Me: “I’m a touchy person and I want rubbies!”

Husband: “Well I wanted Salmon Stew but we don’t always get what we want, do we?!”

Me: “Rude….”

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Showing Your Brain The Door

| UK | Boyfriend/Girlfriend, Popular

(My boyfriend and I are pet-sitting for a family and have only been here a couple of days so still are getting used to the house. My boyfriend is also a DJ, and has recently worked until six am for a couple of nights so is running on very little sleep and is doubly dopey. He decides to put a wash on as I make dinner.)

Boyfriend: *in other room* “For f***s sake! You were working yesterday! Gah! Why won’t you work! God d*** it!”

(He continues like this for about ten minutes whilst I’m chuckling to myself, before I hear him storm into the kitchen.)

Boyfriend: “Babe! Please can you go do it? I don’t know what’s going on.”

(I go in the other room, put the wash on, and return.)

Boyfriend: “What did you do?!”

Me: “I closed the door.”