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Deliriously Charming

| Glasgow, Scotland, UK | Boyfriend/Girlfriend

(At my work, I often get mistaken for a few other women who apparently look quite similar to me. I’m quite used to this now, but my boyfriend finds it amusing. He is good at giving compliments, but always has to follow them up with a caveat, which is usually mildly insulting. He is off work ill and is messaging me on my way into work.)

Boyfriend: “Wish you were here.”

Me: “Me, too. Get some sleep and give me a shout whenever.”

Boyfriend: “Okay. Hope your day is good and that you aren’t mistaken for women who you are much hotter than.” *sends heart-eyed emoji*

Me: “Aww! See, knew you could be a charmer.”

Boyfriend: “Haha, maybe it’s my delirium… See, a real charmer wouldn’t have said that bit!” *smirks*

Me: “STOP RUINING IT!”

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Suited To The Character

| IA, USA | Boyfriend/Girlfriend

(My boyfriend and I are doing the long distance thing and talk a lot through the day via instant messenger. This is just a sample of what our conversations are like.)

Boyfriend: “I’m the same size as George Costanza, though… We wear the same suit size.”

Me: “I have some bad news.”

Boyfriend: “Uh oh.”

Me: “That’s not a real person.”

Boyfriend: “HE IS TO ME”

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Particle Accelerated To The Punchline

| Los Angeles, CA, USA | Dating, Popular

(I am texting my boyfriend about a joke I saw on the Internet.)

Me: “Why are subatomic particles Catholic?”

Boyfriend: “Because they hold mass.”

Me: “Because they have mass.”

Me: “…”

Me: “D*** IT, [Boyfriend]! I WANTED TO TELL IT!”

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