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  • September Theme Of The Month: Overheard!

    September Theme Of The Month: Overheard!

    Announcements, Theme Of The Month
    Introducing the Theme Of The Month: Overheard!

    Entering is easy:

    1. Submit a funny or interesting story about this month’s theme: Overheard. Share a story about a memorable conversation you’ve overheard between those in a relationship!
    2. At the end of the month, we’ll feature our favorite Theme Of The Month stories in a roundup!

    The Breakup From Another World

    | Ontario, CA, USA | Dating

    (I am at the park with a guy I’ve recently started seeing and we are talking about relationships, when we get onto the topic of breakups.)

    Me: “Well, this one guy I was seeing broke up with me over text. Don’t do that; it will just make me mad at you. If you don’t want to do it in person AT LEAST pick up the phone and call me.”

    Guy: “Well, I have this crazy notion that maybe my next relationship won’t end at all. Unless we encounter something really wrong that we can’t get past.” *thinks* “Like if I find out you’re actually an alien using me to create and protect your alien babies while you overthrow humanity.”

    Me: *bursts out laughing*

    Guy: “In that situation I’d come see you with my ion gun, and be like “Look, you’re really great and I’ve really enjoyed being around you, but this can’t work out. I’m sorry.” and then I’d have to vaporize you.”

    Me: “Wow, that’s harsh. Couldn’t just let me go in peace?”

    Guy: “Well, you ARE trying to overthrow the human race!”

    Me: “…Maybe you should break up with me over text…”

    Has A Hand In This Affair

    | PA, USA | Dating

    (My boyfriend and I are in bed after our alarm goes off, and neither of us want to get out of bed, so we’re goofing around. He has just made an arrogant joke and has his right hand under my butt.)

    Me: “Well, if you love you so much, why don’t you marry yourself?”

    Boyfriend: *holds up his left hand* “Hand, will you marry me?”

    Me: “Wait, aren’t you right-handed?”

    Boyfriend: “Shhh… Don’t tell my other hand!”

    (Suddenly he starts wriggling his right hand under my butt.)

    Boyfriend: *in silly voice of “his right hand* “Let me go! I’ll kill him! I’ll kill him!”

    Me: “Hey, at least your right hand’s got my butt.”

    Boyfriend: “Yeah, my left hand’s in a relationship with my penis, and my right hand’s in a relationship with your bum!”

    Love In The Time Of Zombies, Part 13

    | WI, USA | Marriage & Partners

    (My wife and I discuss whether we would be on each other’s zombie apocalypse teams. I tell her she is on my team because at the very least she’d make a good distraction at some point. Somehow, the topic comes up again in conversation.)

    Wife: “So, I know you were reluctant to put me on your team before…”

    Me: “Yeah, but I’ve had some time to think about that and figured out a new plan.”

    Wife: “Which is?”

    Me: “You’d DEFINITELY be on my team. Because I don’t think I’d want to survive the apocalypse just to live in a world without you.”

    Wife: “…Okay, you just won that question forever.”

    Related:
    Love In The Time Of Zombies, Part 12
    Love In The Time Of Zombies, Part 11
    Love In The Time Of Zombies, Part 10

    A Love Greater Than Westeros

    | Oveido, FL, USA | Dating

    (My boyfriend and I are Game of Thrones fans and are at game shop while on vacation with some friends.)

    Me: “Baby, do you have $300?”

    Boyfriend: “Why?”

    Me: “Because there is a Boratheon crown in the window…”

    Boyfriend: “Why would you want a Boratheon crown? They’re all dead.”

    Me: “Because I want to be king of Westeros! I want to win the Game of Thrones!”

    Boyfriend: “But, in the Game of Thrones, you either win or you die. I’m not willing to take that chance.”

    Me: “Aww…. This is going on the Internet.”


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