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    Archive for 2007

    Behind Every Husband Is A Brutally Honest Wife

    | Louisville, KY, USA | Marriage & Partners

    (I go to a table of four, a mom and dad and two kids who are ready to order.)

    Husband: “How big are your pizzas?”

    Me: “They are 10 inch pizzas, sir.”

    Husband: “Well how big is 10 inches?

    (And before I can answer, the wife chimes in.)

    Wife: “You wouldn’t know anything about 10 inches, dear.”

    (I stood there for a moment with my mouth open, before I ran to the wait station and started laughing hysterically.)

    Also seen on: Not Always Right.

    Taking The Young At Heart Thing Too Far

    | New York, NY, USA | Golden Years

    (An 80 year old woman and her husband come up to the cutting counter with a bolt of sparkly, orange, see-through fabric.)

    80 year-old woman: “Three yards please.”

    Me, as I am measuring: “What are you using this for?”

    80 year-old woman: “I am taking a belly dancing class, and I am going to make my own outfit.”

    (I stare, and the man looks everywhere but his wife.)

    Also seen on: Not Always Right.