(Me and my husband are play-fighting. He’s started to tickle me and I’m falling over laughing.)

Me: “Wait. Have I always sounded like the wicked witch when I laugh, or did that start now?”

Husband: *pauses for a moment* “Nope, that started now.”

(My husband resumes tickling.)

Me: “Stop it! I feel like all I need now is a wart on my nose!”

Husband: “You are my wife. All you ask for, you shall receive!”

(He grabs the back of my neck and starts rubbing my face against a small red dot on his arm.)

Me: *muffled* “I appreciate the sentiment, but that’s not a wart.”

Husband: “No?”

Me: “No.”

Husband: *very disappointed* “I have failed you!”