• Time To Step Up
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  • November Theme Of The Month: Crushes!

    | Canada | Unfiltered

    (I’m talking to my long distance boyfriend on video chat, around the beginning of our relationship. I’m refusing to tell him something that a mutual friend told me about him.)

    Boyfriend: You suck!

    Me: *without thinking* Not yet!

    Boyfriend: *bursts out laughing realizing what I said*

    The Cat Thinks Your Slaughter Is ‘Meh’

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | Dating

    (My boyfriend is playing ‘Defiance’ with heavy metal in the background. The cat walks in and wants to be petted.)

    Cat: “Meow!”

    Boyfriend: “Not now, Rosie! I am slaughtering people! Be reasonable!”

    Cat: “Meow! Meh!”

    Boyfriend: “Meh is not reasonable! You’re going to have to wait until the slaughter is over!”

    Me: “Meh?”

    Boyfriend: “Okay, maybe meh is reasonable…”

    Cat: “Meh!”

    Make That Pain Extinct

    | Portsmouth, England, UK | Marriage & Partners

    (I have a chronic illness which means most days I am in a lot of pain and can’t do very much. My husband is extremely supportive, and we get through everything with humour. We are going to bed after a particularly bad day:)

    Me: “I’m sorry I’ve been a wreck today.”

    Husband: “You have been quite a dinosaur today…”

    Me: “What’s that supposed to mean?”

    Husband: “You’ve Been-a-sore-arse-wreck…”

    (Cue him collapsing into giggles and me feeling a lot better!)

    Magic: The Separating

    | Dallas, TX, USA | Marriage & Partners

    (My new husband (of about a month) and I are playing Magic: The Gathering with his brother at our place. As usually happens, the table talk revolves around which two of us are going to gang up on the other to take them out of the game first, although these fragile alliances rarely last. My husband is trying to convince his brother not to attack him on the next turn.)

    Husband: “Look, with this card I’ve played, all the damage that you do to me is just going to go to [My Name] anyway! I don’t care about her! She means nothing to me!”

    Me: “I’m sitting right here, you know!”

    Husband’s Brother: “And so it begins…”

    Calculated To A Fault

    | PA, USA | Dating

    (My boyfriend and I have just had a sort-of fight, and I am feeling very guilty as I overreacted due to unrelated stress, making it mostly my fault.)

    Me: “I just hate that it’s all my fault, you know?

    Boyfriend: “I’ll take 10% of the blame if you like.”

    Me: “Oh, only 10%? How generous of you.”

    Boyfriend: “All right, 20%, but that’s my final offer, and if you reject it, it’s back to 10%.”

    Me: “…25%?”

    Boyfriend: “20%.”

    Me: “…Fine. 20%.”

    Boyfriend: “I love you, so I’ll make it 22.5%.”

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