A Leaf In The Windshield

| Georgetown, KY, USA | Boyfriend/Girlfriend

(My girlfriend and I are in the car and the car in front of us is really dirty, and in the dirt, someone has written “Wash me.” We’re both fans of ‘Firefly.’)

Me: “Wash me? I feel like impaling that vehicle now.”

Girlfriend: *punches me* “Oh, god d*** it. I hate you.” *after a moment* “Though we’d have to impale it from the front.”


A Weighty Issue, Part 2

| AB, Canada | Boyfriend/Girlfriend

(My boyfriend has just gotten home from work. I mention I have to go shopping tonight. I’ve recently had some health problems and the medication has caused me to gain quite a bit of weight.)

Boyfriend: “Why?”

Me: “Because I’m fat and I need new clothes.”

Boyfriend: “You’re not fat.”

Me: “The fact that I need bigger clothes begs to differ.”

Boyfriend: *pauses, and I think I’ve stumped him, when finally…* “That just means you’re growing up!”

Me: *dies laughing*

A Weighty Issue


Will Have Something To Say In The Comments About This

| USA | Boyfriend/Girlfriend

(My (now ex) girlfriend and I were long distance. This conversation happens after she hasn’t replied to me after a while.)

Me: “You there?”

Girlfriend: “Ya, sorry. I was watching YouTube.”

Me: “Why won’t you just talk to me then?”

Girlfriend: “Youtuubbbbeee.”

Me: “Are you cheating on me with YouTube?”

Girlfriend: “It’s not you; it’s me.”

Page 1/1,69812345...Last